I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
he thought i was a dude.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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