i don't plan on having that self control this summer
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
