Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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