Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
