i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
