lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
People with herpes should wear stickers.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
