I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
