Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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