I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
