He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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