'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Randomize
