he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
