What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
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FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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