oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
