Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
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