Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Mom said you looked used
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Randomize
