you mean i was at the winter classic?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
