I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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