I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
