That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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