Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize