Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
