R you on birth control?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after