its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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