I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
I love you.
Bad choice
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
