I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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