Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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