Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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