3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
