I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
