We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
found the other keg... it's in the tree
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
