It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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