I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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