My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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