its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
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last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
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