I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I think im going to throw up on grandma
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
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