But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
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