Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
