Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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