Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
