so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
