you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
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