well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
worst night to have a conscience
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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