North Korea, Best Korea!
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
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