No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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