I should be sponsored by Trojan
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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