So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
