Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
I love you.
Bad choice
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
