mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
