I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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