I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
