i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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