Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
You smell like stripper and shame
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
