so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
